Taking the Stress out of Valentines Day
I see a lot of people freaking out about Valentines Day because of unspoken expectations and worries about letting partners down. I see stress because some people don’t have partners and this holiday is an uncomfortable reminder. I see stress because this holiday can be incredibly heteronormative (like most holidays).
Here are some ideas to lower your stress on V day:
- COMMUNICATION. If we taught children better communication, they would grow up a lot happier and I might be out of a job. Tell your partner what you want. So many people are afraid of seeming needy or high maintenance, so they just hope that their partner knows what they expect. This just causes hurt feelings and fights. Ask for what you need, even if it feels uncomfortable. Ask your partner for what they want as well.
- Self-Care Day. What if you spent Valentines Day focusing on compassion and love for yourself? I think this is a positive idea for people who are both in relationships and for those who are not. Make some plans to really focus on what makes you happy and make your needs a priority.
- Be Different. Celebrate what makes you (and partners if you have them) different and unique. Who says you need to buy flowers and chocolate? Make a tradition that is unique to you and that you look forward to.
- Show Gratitude. Tell people in your life that you think of them, that you love them, and that you are grateful for them. Include lovers, friends, partners, family, coworkers, etc. Expressing gratitude is good for your wellness and helps people feel connected.
Don’t play into the VDay hype and stress (unless you’re into kind of thing!)